Genesis 5020

My Story for His Glory

Hope’s Story-Part 5 November 9, 2012

Filed under: Hope's Story — Melissa Finnegan @ 11:27 am
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If you have missed the first four parts of Hope’s Story you can find them here, here, here and here.

Hope’s Story

By Alaina Hiatt

Through the night, the nurses brought us a keepsake box with a birthstone necklace, a baby-powder scented cape and blanket that were Hope’s size, and a few other momentos.  They also gave us a “Certificate of Life” which they had taken the time to put Hope’s handprints on.  We were touched by their thoughtfulness.  We also gave the hospital permission to take pictures of her, should we want them someday.

The next morning, we were thrilled to be leaving the hospital and yesterday behind, though it filled us with such sadness to know we were leaving Hope behind

The next few days brought quite a bit of activity as we planned Hope’s memorial service, looked for an angel to leave at the cemetery, looked for non-maternity clothes to wear to the service and designing Hope’s birth announcements.

Friday morning, July 18, 2003, dawned a beautiful summer day—part of me was thrilled knowing that the graveside service would have clear weather, but part of me couldn’t understand how the sky was not gray with a slow and steady rain falling. 

I was already realizing that life marched on as though nothing had happened, though I knew my life would never be the same again. 

We had chosen to have an intimate graveside service attended only by our immediate family and friends because we knew we couldn’t handle a visitation or church service—nothing we were living was normal and we wanted to remember Hope our own way. 

Both our pastor and my Uncle (a pastor) spoke at the graveside and it was an absolutely beautiful service.  My Uncle had his part of the service bound in a little book for me and I’d like to share part of it with you now.

We’ve come today to say goodbye to one we hardly knew.  She was not with us long, but she was dearly loved and will be sorely missed.  Kelly and Alaina, her loss is especially painful  for you.  But from the first day we knew she would be coming we loved her too, because we  love you.  In this family, babies are always “our babies.”

You named her well.  Hope Elizabeth.  Hope presented to God.  From the first moment you knew she was coming, through the shock and pain of the initial diagnosis and all along the painful  road that brings us here today, you were filled with hope.  Hope that the diagnosis was wrong.  Hope that somehow there would be a miracle that would bring her safe and whole into this  world and your arms.  Those things were not to be.

 But you hoped for other things.  We all hoped and prayed that God would strengthen you and  give you wisdom.  He has.  We hoped that God would bring you comfort, peace, and rest in his loving arms.  He will.

 Today is not the end of our hope.  Indeed in a very special way,
it is the beginning of a Journey of Hope.

Though this journey is not one that I would have chosen for myself, I know I’m not alone as I walk this path.  In a card that we received from a friend is a quote which can be found on Hope’s headstone today:

Hope is waiting with expectation for the good and even miraculous
things that God will unfold.

Next week we will conclude Hope’s story, although that isn’t entirely true. Hope’s life and death has touched many other lives and will continue to do so. Next week find out how God used all of this for good, to bring Himself glory. The enemy could have used this story to tear down Kelly and Alaina’s faith, that did not happen.  

What’s your Genesis 5020? We want you to share your story. It doesn’t have to be long (it can be), it can be a short one week blurb. What is something in your life that the enemy could have used to pull you away from God, to question your faith, but God used it to make you stronger and to draw you closer to Him? It could be anything you know God has done in  your life. Share your story with us: 5020genesisstories(at)gmail(dot)com.

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Part XVIII-Genesis 50:20 June 22, 2012

Even though I was healing things were not perfect. Patrick struggled many days. There were times he would tell me he was going over to the man’s house to beat him to a pulp.

I begged and pleaded. That would not fix anything.

Those times usually resulted in us talking things through, of Patrick needing more information and me feeling all the shame of what I had done.

Anger fueled Patrick. I couldn’t blame him. I knew I did this to our marriage. I brought this on by my choices and there are consequences for turning away from God. Things weren’t going to be wonderful, I disobeyed my Savior. I grieved Him.

I didn’t always react in the best way either. I would get angry. I was changing, couldn’t Patrick see that? My outbursts didn’t help Patrick and only caused more tension and stress between us. We wondered if things would ever be normal again.

And what did normal look like? Was normal our life before the affair, because that didn’t work out so well?

My birthday is in the summer and Deanna heard that Tenth Avenue North was coming to a town near us and the tickets were really cheap.

The day after my birthday we went and saw them. I needed that concert. I cried and danced. All the songs that God used to speak to me I heard in person.

At that concert they played a song that had not been released yet. I felt like the words were written just for me. The song is called You Are More. I desperately wanted those words to be true. But could I  believe it? Was I remade, was I new?

Most days I still didn’t feel new.

I prayed Psalm 142:7 again and again. The verse became my cry on days I felt like I couldn’t escape the horrible thoughts that invaded my mind.

Set me free from my prison,
    that I may praise your name.

At our first meeting with our counselor she told us about a book  Torn Asunder. I highly recommend this book for any couple suffering through any type of affair.

Hidden in that book is a verse that would forever change the way Patrick and I saw my affair. I am sure I heard the verse before but now this verse spoke to us in a new way.

The verse was Genesis 50:20.

In that book we found the verse that would become the foundation for this blog.

At that point I didn’t want to tell anyone what I had done. My parents could never know. I was the child who didn’t make bad choices, or at least I was good at hiding them. My church couldn’t know, what would they think of their worship leader? My Pastor couldnt’ know, we were good friends with him.

But God knew that verse would change our lives.

Genesis 50:20 is our lifeline. We believe in that verse with all our being. We didn’t know how God was going to use our pain for good. What we did know is that God keeps His promises. If he said our heartache will be used for good then we believed Him.

I am so excited to share the next part with you. God is about to do some crazy stuff!

You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.  Genesis 50:20 NIV

Can you share a song that  you felt was written just for you? Come on, don’t be shy : )